Sunday, December 27, 2009

Merry Christmas

I would like to take a moment to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas. Leading up to Christmas this year was very hard on my family. I am so glad that Christmas day was a wonderful day with no problems.

All the problems that I have had with my fertility has really been rough on my family. We had another loss this year and it was as hard on us as our first loss. We really felt that pregnancy was going to be different and was going to be the one that held to term. We were wrong. It put us in a real financial hole and there was a point were we did not think there was going to be a Christmas for our family this year. We decided the hell with all the hospital bills and we had a great Christmas. We still have to deal with the bills but it is worth it to see Boober's face light up because he got what he wanted for Christmas.

Well I got the results from my sugar test and it came back high but not high enough for the doctor to issue a prescription for the monitoring supplies. Now why would my sugar levels come back high and me not be diabetic. Not to mention the fact I am taking 2000 mg of Metformin a day. That just does not make since to me. Plus the Metformin makes me itch like crazy so my hubby stole my pills and will not let me take them. He told me he is not going to let me take something that is making me scratch holes in my chest and that was that.

Merry Christmas to all!!

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Monday, December 7, 2009

Testing update

I finally got my lab slip for the blood sugar testing and to test my liver function. I will be going to the lab in the morning to get the blood drawn. Right now I think the test is going to take 3 days to get the results but I will find out at the lab for sure.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Sugar Test and More

I was suppose to get my lab slip today to get my HGB-A1C test done. It did not come in the mail today. So I am bummed out about that.

I have been making more jewelry for the IVF fund tho. Check this out:

Hand made!!! This is my Rosette ring that I make. I love this ring. :) If you want to take a look at the new items listed for sell please go here: Jewelry for Hope 
I am working on more items and have more to list. I just have not uploaded the pictures yet for them. Christmas is coming and there is some great stuff up there.

But you are not here to talk about that!! LOL
I goofed and did not eat when I was suppose to today and I felt like I was going to pass out. Yeppers I got fuzzy headed and almost fell flat on my face. I caught myself before that happened. I ate a piece of candy and what do you know I felt better. HHHMMMMM Sounds like my sugar dropped to me!! Another sign of being diabetic. There are many things pointing to this and the doctors wonder why I think I am. Well duh dudes my body is telling me to have this looked at. ROFLAO Sometimes we just need to listen to our bodies and say to hell with what the doctors think and take matters into our own hands to make sure things get done. So my message for everyone today is to listen to your bodies and do what is best for you!!

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

HGB-A1C Blood Test and Chem Panel

I have some good news. I called and demanded a blood test be done for my sugars. The test I demanded is the HGB-A1C. This test will tell how my body has handled sugar in the last 6 months. I also found out that Metformin can cause liver damage. I did not know this. With this new information I am going to have a chem panel done to check my liver function. After I called and spoke to the nurse she told me she would go over this with the doctor and call me back. She called me back about one hour later and informed me the doctor has approved me having the blood work and she would mail me the lab slip today and I should get it by Wednesday. So I will be having the blood draw on Thursday. I am not sure how long it will take to get the results but I will be finding that part out soon. I am just thrilled to be getting the tests finally done!! Well that is all for today.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Thoughts and Feelings

I am sorry I have not posted. I have been in such a funk since the miscarriage. I can not seem to get out of this state of depression. I am just so mad and sad at the same time. I keep asking myself why me. It is questions that can not be answered. With all the problems that I have (MTHFR, PCOS, endometriosis, thyroid) and no one wanting to really fix them. All I get is lets try again. My mind is telling me something more is wrong and I can not even get the doctors to check my sugars. I am going to call on Monday and demand a diabetes test be done. My Mom is a nurse and I have told her what is going on with all symptoms and she tells me I am diabetic. I have a history of diabetes in my family I am shocked no one is willing to check my sugars.

I do feel I am not able to get out of this funk due to not posting. So I am going to be posting more and more. I feel this will help me to weed out my feelings and get them out. I have a bad habit of holding everything in until I pop and that I need to correct. I have to stop doing that. I am just making it worse if you know what I mean. Well that is all for tonight. I will post what I find out when I call the Doctor on Monday.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

A day with hubby and son!

Today was a good day. We slept in till 12 and then loaded the car with model rockets. We then went way out in the desert and played with the rockets for most of the day. Super fun!! Boober and Hubby had a BLAST!!! We all hopped in the car and headed for the North Side. I wanted to go to the bead specialty store to pick up some stuff I needed. We got there and low and behold they had a ring mandrel!!! I am so super excited. I have been looking all over for one and now I have one. I will be making rings for my IVF fund site. I am having so much fun with the new tool. Can not wait to post the new rings on the site. Keep an eye out for them. I made a new button for the IVF fund site. If you would like to put the button on your blog the grab the code link is located on the left hand side of my blog and I thank you in advance for everyone who posts the button. All in all it was a super fun day! :)

Baby Dust to ALL and Sticky Dust as well!! (I know I could use lots of both.)

Sunday, November 15, 2009

The joys of H1N1

Well the last 2 weeks have been fun.... NOT >>>> LOL
Boober got the H1N1 virus and I had to take him to the doctor to get meds. He is feeling much better now but I have had a migraine for the last 3 days. YUCK. I was spraying Lysol like crazy all week. Thank God he is feeling better now tho.

I added more jewelry today to the fund raising blog: Jewelry for Hope lots of new items to choose from. There are some great Christmas ideas there :)

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Jewelry for Hope

I have created a new blog called Jewelry for Hope. This blog is for selling my beaded jewelry to raise money for the infertility treatments that I will be incurring. I am hopeful that I will be able to raise enough money for at least one round of IVF. Check out my new blog and let me know what you all think. Thank you for your support in my time of loss as well. I miss my little pea very much.

Baby Dust to ALL!!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

An example of my craft.

I am posting some pictures of some of the jewelry that I made. Let me know if it is something that I can sell and if I should start making items to sell for my infertility treatment. Please be honest and tell me exactly what you think.




I am not sure why some of the pictures turned to the side, but here are some of the items I have made.

Baby Dust to ALL!!

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Any Suggestions????

Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can raise money for infertility treatments? I make beaded jewelry and was thinking about selling necklaces and bracelets. Is that a good idea? Just one round of IVF will cost $9000.00. In January my RE wants to start me on Clomid to increase the chances of ovulation. Due to my PCOS I do not ovulate regularly. Any suggestions would really help.

Thank you all!

Baby Dust to ALL!!

Thursday, October 29, 2009

To remember my Little One

I made this little video for a memorial to my little Pea.

Baby Dust to all!!!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Feelings After 4th Miscarriage

This week has been hard for me. I feel so empty without my little Pea. Secondary infertility is not easy to live with. People will say "Sometimes this happens." or "This is how nature weeds out the bad eggs.". These things hurt people like me. The people that say these things do not know the pain I went through to get pregnant and they do not know the pain I have went through going through 4 miscarriages. I do not wish this pain on my worst enemy. TTC (trying to conceive) for a person with infertility is a very hard road to travel. But we travel this road hoping for our healthy babies. We have heart ache, pain, disappointment, anger and more but we press on. Just saying "I am sorry for your loss." is good enough for me. Do not tell me it is for the best or maybe something was wrong with my baby. Understanding is the key to comforting someone that is on this road. I am so glad to have so many blogger friends that understand what I am going through. I love you all and I thank you for your support. I just needed to get some feelings out and what better place to do it. I just need to heal emotionally. The physical healing is the easy part. I let myself believe everything was going to be fine with this last pregnancy. I let my guard down and I loved my little baby that was growing inside of me. Do not get me wrong I loved that little baby from the moment I found out I was pregnant. What I mean is I let myself believe everything was going to be perfect and it made it harder for me when I found out that I was losing my little one. So now for the healing to start.

Today, October 15th is pregnancy and infant loss awareness day.

Missing our babies today:
January 2006
January 2007
January 2009
October 2009

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Sunday, October 11, 2009

My First Blog Award

I receive this award from "Hannah" @ My Infertility Journey. Thank you so much. You are super sweet. :)

1. You Can Only Use One Word!
2. Pass this along to 6 of your favorite bloggers
3. Alert them that you have given them this award!
4. Have Fun!

The Survey~
1. Where is your cell phone? Desk
2. Your hair? Brown
3. Your mother? Caring
4. Your father? Compassionate
5. Your favorite food? Pizza
6. Your dream last night? Sucked
7. Your favorite drink? StarBucks
8. Your dream/goal? Baby
9. What room are you in? Lining-Room
10. Your hobby? Crafts
11. Your fear? Another-Miscarriage
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Happy
13. Where were you last night? Home
14. Something that you aren’t? Complete
15. Muffins? Blue-Berry
16. Wish list item? Baby
17. Where did you grow up? Mississippi
18. Last thing you did? Meds
19. What are you wearing? Clothing
20. Your TV? TLC
21. Your pets? Lots
22. Friends? Best
23. Your life? Broken
24. Your mood? Depression
25. Missing someone? Little-Pea
26. Vehicle? Car
27. Something you’re not wearing? Shoes
28. Your favorite store? BestBuy
29. Your favorite color? Teal
30. When was the last time you laughed? Yesterday
31. Last time you cried? Today
32. Your best friend? Husband
33. One place that I go to over and over? Friends
34. One person who emails me regularly? Friend
35. Favorite place to eat? Cracker Barrel

I am awarding this blog award to~

1. Mary - A Hopeful Unicorn
2. UnicornMommy - UnicornMommy
3. Tammy - Tammy's Journey
4. Nicole - The Abramczyk's
5. WhatIF? - WhatIF?
6. Polly - In 2 Me See

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Emergency Ambulance Ride and Emergency Surgery

On 10-05-2009 the pain got so bad that I could not take it any more. Then I started hemorrhaging. Hubby called an ambulance to come get me. I was taken to the hospital were they gave me morphine. The pain was so bad it only took the edge off. I then signed a blood transfusion waver due to the loss of blood. I was then taken for emergency surgery. The emergency D&C was preformed and then I woke up in recovery.

I feel very empty inside. I am not sure why this is happening to me for the 4th time. Dang 4 miscarriages!! What is wrong with me??? I am going to go back to the doctor in a week for the post op appointment and then I will see my re again after that. I will post more when my head is clear and I can think straight.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Going Natural

I have made a decision. I am not going to have the D&C done. I have had 2 D&C's and a blighted ovum. The more D&C's you have the more scaring and damage to the uterus there is. I talked with my doctor and explained my choice to go natural. She has agreed and it is what is best for me at this time. I have not started bleeding and I still feel pregnant as of today. If nothing starts by Friday I will return to my doctor and we will do another ultrasound to see what is going on in there. But as of today I am on an emotional roller coaster ride just waiting for it to start. I am not sure why this is happening to me again. When someone tells me "Sometimes this just happens." I want to punch them and say "NOT 4 TIMES IT DOES NOT!!" There is more wrong with me than we know and this just proves it. If we try again I am thinking I need to go holistic. I feel I need to get back to nature. If anyone has any tips or sites that cover this area please let me know. Right now I am just going threw a lot of emotional pain, sadness, anger, unknowing and fear. I am not sure if I can go through this again. But I know for a fact my son can not go through this again. I will be even more careful to make sure he does not find out if we try again.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Friday, September 25, 2009

Bad News VERY Bad News!!!

I had my doctors appointment today and my OB did our weekly ultrasound. My little Pea does not have a heart beat any longer. :( I was sent to a high risk clinic for another scan and to confirm there was no heart beat. Unfortunately it was then confirmed. My little Pea passed away at 8 weeks and 2 days according to the scans. My worst fears have come true again. This makes my 4th miscarriage. My heart is broken and I am not in a good state right now. I will post pictures of my little Pea later I just can not bring myself to do that at this time. My doctor wants me to call on Monday to schedule a D&C.

Please pray for my family during our time of grieving.

Baby Dust to ALL!!

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Waiting for Friday

Will Friday ever come???

I know it will. But the wait is killing me. I pray all the time for all my blogger friends and my little pea. I know what ever happens is God's will. I know this pregnancy is in his hands now and I should not worry. I am doing everything I can to make this pregnancy last. I am taking all my meds and doing all my blood work as soon as it is due. I am having my thyroid checked and re-checked like I am suppose to as well. I am going to all my doctor's appointments. So what is there left for me to do. Stop worrying that is what!! LOL Easier said than done right?? I am giving my worries to God. He will take care of us. I trust in him and know he is an AWESOME God and he will take care of me and my little pea!

I purchased a Fetal Heart Doppler. I will be posting pictures of the Doppler and a complete review as soon as it comes in. I will be testing the Doppler and posting the results. I will also post a complete review of all the features of the Doppler, the company I purchased the Doppler from and the shipping. Keep a look out for this post. I should be receiving my Doppler any day now.

Please keep my little pea in your prayers!!

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Friday, September 18, 2009

8 Week UltraSound

I had our 8 week ultrasound yesterday and everything went GREAT!! We are having another ultra sound done on the 25th. The baby is measuring 15.6 mm and the little heart is beating strong. We even saw the baby move on the ultrasound. It was AWESOME!!!! God is an AWESOME God!!

Thank you for all the prayers. They have really helped. Please keep them coming.

Baby Dust To ALL!!!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Another scan on the 17th

I am going in to the doctor on the 17th for another ultrasound. I am very nervous about this scan. I will be 8 weeks 1 days. This is very close to when I lost my second baby. I am feeling like I should. I have felt sick all day which is a great thing. I am praying all the time that everything is fine. I wish I did not worry so much. I wish I could be happy and not have that what if in the back of my mind. I will be so glad when I get out of the first trimester. I will have such a weight lifted off my shoulders then. I will post an update tomorrow with all the details about my Doctor's visit.

Please pray for my little bean.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Sunday, September 13, 2009

4 more days untill my next scan!!

It seems like this week has been going by so slow. It feels like the 17th is never going to get here. I have been so tired but that is a good thing. :) I felt like I was going to toss my cookies all day today. But that is a great thing as well. So far everything has been fine and I am feeling the way I should. I am just so nervous and excited. Boober keeps asking when I am going back to the doctor so he can see his baby sister again. We do not even know if it is a boy or a girl yet. LOL

Thank you so much to everyone that is praying for us. I can feel your warm thoughts and prayers. Please keep us in your prayers.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Baby Update!!!

Had my doctor's appointment today and everything went GREAT!!! The baby is measuring 7 wks 0 days. Right on track from last weeks scan. I am going back in on the 17th for another scan. We are not out of the woods yet but right now I am praising the Lord that everything is going good. :) The baby is now 9.4 mm!!! The heart beat is nice and strong.

Please keep those prayers coming they are really helping!!

Baby Dust To ALL!!!

Friday, September 4, 2009

Not out of the woods yet!!

I had my sonogram done yesterday. I got there early but Doc H got me in right away. We started the sonogram and saw the sac on the screen 1st thing. We could not see the fetal pole. He measured the sac and it is 18 mm. Then the search was on from there. It felt like an eternity. I kept saying to myself "Everything is going to be fine. The baby is there. Please just find it." Then I had to remind myself to breath. That is when we found the fetal pole and the little beating heart. The sac is measuring 6 wks 2 days and the fetal pole is measuring 6 wks 0 days and is 4mm CRL. This may be due to my screwed up cycles. I go from 33 to 35 days in a cycle not the normal 28. The heart rate is 117 BPM. Right now my chances of miscarriage are 35 to 40%. On the 9th of September we are doing another sonogram at Dr. H's wife's office (yes my RE's wife is my OB LOL). Then if she can not get me in for another sonogram 1 week after that Doc H wants to do the Sono at his office. If everything goes fine for the next 2 weeks my chances of miscarriage will drop down to 7%!! So I am still worried. God is watching over us. I can feel it!

We can use all the prayers we can get right now!!!

Baby Dust to ALL!!

Sunday, August 30, 2009

The 3rd of September

The 3rd of September is almost here. On this day I have the sonogram done and I will get to see the baby. We will get to see if everything is alright in there. I am excited and very nervous all wrapped up in one.

Please God let everything be alright in there!!!

Baby Dust to all!!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Appointment Change!!

I talked to Doc. H and he wants to see me before the 14th. So we rescheduled my appointment for September the 3rd at 10:30 a.m. I am so glad to get in sooner to see him. I can not help but be worried and I am trying not to be. Easier said than done right?? I want to be happy and oblivious to the problems that can happen. I want to be one of those people that can find out they are pregnant and not say "God please let this be the one." I want to want to tell the world but I can not. I want to be one of those people that can start working on the baby's room as soon as they find out they are expecting. I want to be able to look at baby outfits without bursting into tears and saying to my self "Please let everything be alright with my baby." This may sound crazy to some of my readers but, I know most of you know what I am feeling and understand. I just want to know everything is all right and going to stay that way. I do not want to have to worry. But that is something I do not have the privilege of anymore. I do not care if I puke for the entire pregnancy. I do not care if I feel tired (which I do very much so) and I do not care what pregnancy symptoms I have. It is all worth it in the end. Now I just need to get there. I do know it helps to write about my worries and makes me a little less stressed. That is a wonderful thing. Today I celebrate being pregnant, my wonderful parents, my beautiful son, my awesome husband, and everything in life God has granted me.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Monday, August 24, 2009

Going Crazy!!

I am going crazy!! Doc. H's nurse told me he was going to want to see me at 6 weeks but she scheduled my first pregnancy appointment for the 14th of September and I will be 8 weeks along. With all my problems in the past I am freaking out that my first sonogram is that far out. I am going to be calling the office back today to try to get in earlier. Cas if I do not I am going to go completely MAD!!!

I am so nervous and scared. I am praying constantly that everything is OK. I need to know everything is fine. I need to know as soon as I can what is going on in there. I need to know my baby is doing well. I just need right now. After all the miscarriages and TTC for such a long time I am just so scared. I also find myself crying more over my baby angels.

Boober does not know yet but I think he is getting a clue. He told me the other day "Mommy there is a Baby in your tummy and it is growing and doing great. Mommy it is perfect." I almost busted into tears. How does he know? I have been so careful not to tell him. I do not want him to go through that again. Hell I do not want to go through that again. God is watching over me and I know he hears my cries.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Friday, August 21, 2009

HCG Update

Well ladies the results of my HCG test are in ................................... My level was 53 on Tuesday and on Thursday the levels went UP to 180!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am scheduled for an ultra sound on September 14th.

Doc H had the lab check my thyroid and my levels came back high in the T something. So this means I am hypothyroidism and I have an under active thyroid. So now I have a thyroid disorder to add to my other disorders. He called in a script for Levothyroxin and I will be taking that every day as well as all my other pills. We will be re checking my thyroid levels in 6 to 8 weeks. I will talk to Doc H on the 14th about re testing my levels sooner. I am taking 90 mg of progesterone every morning and will continue this through my 1st trimester.

My EDD is April 24th. Today I am 4 weeks 6 days pregnant.

Pray for my little miracle and me please :)
Sticky thoughts!!

Baby Dust to all!!!!!!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Checking HCG Levels again

I went to check my HCG levels today and I will find out the results tomorrow. On Tuesday I went in and had the HCG levels checked and they were 50. So I need them to come back at least 100. I am so nervous!!!

When I got to the lab this morning I was the first one there. I was thinking this is GREAT. I will be out of here in no time. Not the case. That is what I get for thinking!! Well the lab lost my blood work order that the Doctor sent over. I was like "How do you lose someones blood work order? It was just sent yesterday at 11:00 am." She told me the fax machine must have glitched and they would not do the blood work without the order. So I got on the phone and called my Doctor. He called me right back and asked to speak to the lab technician. I handed her my phone and she told my Doctor "I am sorry but I can not take the blood work order over the phone you have to re fax it." Then she handed me back the phone. My Doctor was so upset with them. He apologised to me and I told him it was OK. About 2 hours later I got a call from the Doctor's office and they re faxed the blood work order and called the lab to make sure they had it. She asked me to go back to the lab and get the blood drawn. So back to the lab I went and thank God they had the paper work this time. So I had the blood draw and headed for home to start our home schooling session with Boober for the day.

I am so tired. It feels like all the energy has been drained out of me. LOL I have had morning sickness for the last week and I have tossed my cookies once already. Which is all wonderful and I am not complaining one little bit. LOL I got my progesterone and I am taking that every morning.

Sticky Baby Sticky Baby!!!! (I have been saying that over and over in my head.)

Baby Dust to ALL!!!!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

The BIG Update!!!!!


I can not believe it my self but I am. My HCG came back 50 and we are rechecking in the morning and I am praying it is 100 then. I got my progesterone today and took my first dose. I am scared and happy all at once.

Please God let this be the one!!! Hold on little bean and GROW baby GROW!!!!

Baby Dust to all!!!

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Baby Ava Update

I want to thank everyone for their prayers. Baby Ava is home with her mom and dad and she is doing great. :)

Baby Dust to ALL!!!!

Friday, July 24, 2009

A trip to the park!!

I took Boober to the park and decided I do not have any good pics of me at all. So I got out the digi camera and started getting some pics. I really like the way they turned out and this is just a few :)

Baby dust to ALL!!!

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Cycle day 3

Today is cycle day 3 and let me tell you these cramps are killing me. Hubby and I are going to be trying again this month to get pregnant. I am excited and scared all rolled up in one. My hormones are all out of whack and I want to cry. I know I will get threw this and move on. The 20th is my Hubby's B-Day and his day off so I hope I can make it a good day for him. I have to get out of my funk and get those pics off that camera of mine and post some of them.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Working through the gross feelings!!

Working through the yucky feelings from the Metformin have been a challenge for me. I hate to puck and I have been doing a bunch of it. It got so bad that Doc H lowered my dose back down to 500 mg for last week and this week. But then I go back to upping the dose again. I always know when I eat something that the meds do not like. It comes on FAST!! Like right after I eat I start feeling that gross feeling. Even some of the things I am told I can eat I can not keep down. Well enough about that.

I have been working out at the gym and taking aerobics classes. I really enjoy my water aerobics and I have started a new class called Body Works Plus Abs. That class is AWESOME!! I am working upper, lower body and core in that class. There is another class called Step Plus Abs and after taking that class I was sore for 3 days. LOL My legs hated me after that one.

Next cycle Hubby and I will start trying again to have a baby. I am praying that all this hard work will get us were we want to be. But I am so afraid of having another miscarriage. After having three it takes all the excitement out of finding out you are pregnant. I pray to God if we get a positive next month everything goes fine. I am super scared it will happen again and pray that that is not in my future. TTC after multiple miscarriages is really hard and with all my medical problems that makes it worse. Pray for me in the coming month.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

I have been sick!!!

I have been so sick lately due to the Metformin that I have really not felt like doing anything. I am sorry I have not posted much lately. When I got to 2000 mg of Metformin a day my body said NO Way!! Well I spent 2 days over the toilet tossing my cookies big time. So I called Doc H and he lowered my dose back down so we can up it later when my body gets more use to the meds.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Boober turned 9 years old!!!

Yesterday was Boober's 9th birthday :) I can not believe my baby is 9 already. We had a little party for him and he loved it and had so much fun. The party was Transformers and Monster Trucks. Boober got to open presents, have chocolate ice cream and chocolate cake. Then hubby took him out to play paintball. He had a blast with that. He got 2 good shots off at his Dad before he could hide. He is still laughing about getting Dad and him not getting shot by the paint balls. They are planning to go again cas he had so much fun.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!!

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Joined A Gym

Well I did it!! LOL I joined a gym and I love it!! I joined the gym LA Fitness on Friday. I worked out Friday and today. I will be going back to the gym in the morning. All the classes are covered on my membership. So I can take any class I want for no additional fee!!! I am going to be doing water aerobics on Tuesdays and Thursdays for sure. I am going to be checking out the yoga class later next week as well. I am enjoying working out at a gym again. The best part is they have daycare for only $10.00 per month and I can put Boober in the daycare often as I want for that price. YES!!!! No need to worry about what days I can workout around my Hubbies work schedule.

Baby Dust to All!!!!!

Thursday, June 25, 2009

HSG Test Results

I had the HSG (Hysterosalpingogram) test done today and all went fine. I got a little cramping when the dye was inserted but other than that there was no pain. I was a little crampy for 2 hours after but it was not bad at all. Everything on the scan was great and there is no problems there. We also got our cryotyping back today and Hubby and I have no problems there. In the words of Doc H "You are both golden there." Thank God that those came out fine. I am so happy about that. I have to skip my Metformin for 2 days and I am on antibiotics for the next 7 days so I am going to be feeling much better. :)

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

HSG Test Today

Well at 2:00 pm I will be getting the HSG test done. At 12:00 I have to take 600 mg of Ibuprofen. At 1:20 I have to take 2 Valium. We will be meeting Doc H at 1:30 for the procedure. I am very nervous.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Monday, June 22, 2009

Happy Fathers Day

Happy Fathers Day to all the fathers out there. Weather you are a father with living children, a father to someones child, you are a mother and a father to a child or you have angel babies. You are still a father and today is your day. I wish you the best day ever today. If you are a father to angel babies just know your little ones are looking down on you and smiling and telling the angel next to him or her "Look that is MY dad!!"

Happy Fathers Day!!!!

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Monday, June 15, 2009

HSG will be done on the 24th

My HSG (Hysterosalpingogram) imaging test is now set to be done on the 24th of this month. I am very nervous about the test but I am sure I will be fine. LOL or should I say the Valium will make me fine for the test. I am instructed to take 2 Valium 30 min before the test. I am praying all is fine on the test and I do not have any problems with the dye.

Today is Day 1 of 1000 mg of Metformin. I am feeling a bit sicker today. I know it will pass but until then bear with me :)

Baby Dust to all!!!

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Upping the dose of Metformin on Monday

I start the 1000 mg of Metformin on Monday. So instead of 500 mg I will be starting the 1000 mg then. I am a little nervous about how my tummy will take the extra 500 mg. LOL My tummy has been very upset with me lately. Even tho I have felt like tossing my salad all over the place I have tried to eat. Sorry I have not been very active on my blogging. I have just felt so gross lately. :(

In 2 weeks I will be having my HSG test done and I am scared about the contrast dye. I am glad Doc H gave me Valium to take before the procedure so I will not be so up tight.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Thursday, June 11, 2009

185 lbs down to 171 lbs

Well I am down from 185 lbs to 171 lbs :) This diet is a rough one but it seems to be working. LOL It is getting hard to do an hour of exercise a day when I am sick all the time on the Metformin. I had no idea I would be this nauseous. I have not thrown up yet but this is only 500 mg a day. Next week is going to be 1000 mg a day. Then the next week after that it will be 1500 mg a day. As if I was not punishing myself enough LOL after that we up it to 2000 mg a day. :) I know this will all be worth it when we have our little miracle.

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Metformin here we go!!

Well today is day 1 for my Metformin!! I have lost weight and my pants are loose. I will give a complete update later on on the total weight lose to this point. I found a restaurant that I can eat at and it was so GOOD!! The restaurant is called Sweet Tomatoes and it is a salad buffet. I enjoyed myself so much there today. I was like a kid in a candy store!! I could eat most everything they had. It was so nice to be able to go somewhere and not have to ask for an ingredients list and then frown and say water please. LOL This diet is a super tough one. But I do know it will all be worth it :)

More to come once I have had some sleep.
Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

14 Years Today

Today is my 14 year anniversary to my Hubby. It does not seem like it has been 14 years. How time flies!! 14 years ago today I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off making sure everything was done and ready for the wedding. I look back and remember all the butterflies I had in my tummy. I remember the tear in my Dad's eye when he hugged me and told me he loved me before he walked me down. The look in my Mom's eye's when she fixed my vale. But most of all I remember the love in my hubbies eyes as he looked into my eyes. We were so young and so in love! WOW what a day!!

I love you my dear husband. You are the love of my life and the father of my son. You are my everything and I am yours. Here is to 14 more wonderful years together!! Happy Anniversary!!

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Monday, June 1, 2009

3 LB's in 4 days!!!

I have lost 3lbs in the last 4 days!! Can you believe it??? I am in SHOCK!! I am so hungry and tired but I know that is only because my body is use to having all those sugars and junk. So I just need to get threw this feeling. LOL I have noticed that if I eat more than this diet tells me to I feel like I ate to much. That is awesome!

My hubby was sick for the last few days so it was hard to post. He had some kind of bug. I am just glad Boober and I did not get it.

I am still waiting for my blood work to get back but, as soon as it does I will post the findings. I am praying nothing else is found.

Baby Dust to ALL!!

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

I am going to STARVE!!!

I am going to starve!!!!

OK OK I know you are wondering what in the world is this crazy lady talking about. LOL
I had my appointment with Doc H and let me start off by saying he is AMAZING!! I found out that for my age and height I am over weight so that is not good. Doc H has put me on a massive diet. Let me tell you I can not eat anything. If God did not make it I can not eat it. If it is meat I can only have a piece that is the size of a deck of cards. I have to eat all vegetables and can only cook in olive oil. Not to mention I can not drink anything either. I am not a vegetarian but it looks like I am going to become one really quick. All of this is not due to the weight, now having to exercise 2 hours a day is but not the diet. LOL He looked at my lab work and I WAS RIGHT. The the blood work shows I am PCOS. I knew it!! He told me my levels are off and I need to be on Metformin. In a few hours I will go for more blood work and Hubby gets to have his blood drawn this time as well :)

Doc H did an ultrasound and found that my ovaries do not appear to have lots of cysts at this time. I am so thankful they are clear right now. But he did find that my endometrium is 7MM thick and I just got off my period this is not good. But the good news is we can fix this.

I am so excited we now have a plan and a great doctor!! I left his office with HOPE and 4 prescriptions. I left knowing that I have PCOS and now a doctor knows it and is treating me for it. I left knowing someone is listening to ME!! I have tears in my eyes right now ... It has been so long since someone (doctors) would listen and understand what I am going through that I am so happy to have Doc H.

The Plan

Lab blood work on 5/27/09 Chempanel Basic, HDL, Prolactin, Cystic Fibrosis and others
Take Folgard, 81 mg aspirin, pre-baby vitamins, Metformin (listed below) and additional folic acid prescription.
Metformin = 500 mg tab
Week 1 = one per day
Week 2 = one pill twice daily
Week 3 = one pill three times daily
Week 4 = two pills twice daily
every week after continue two pills twice daily

On day one of next cycle call office to schedule HSG X-Ray
He gave me Valium to take 30 min before this appointment and then Doxycline for 14 days after treatment.

Then we go from there :)

Did you know how many items have high fructose corn syrup in them?? EVERYTHING ..... Well not everything but dang near it. I was in shock at how many products have this in it. I found out from Doc H that high fructose corn syrup and modified corn starch should be considered poison to your body and that of your children and future children. I did not know this at all. I checked and even my mayonnaise has it in it!! Can you believe that?? I mean DAMN it is in everything and it is SUPER BAD for you. Read your labels and see just how much of this crap we are eating. I am floored and I know what I am going to be doing .... throwing all that stuff out that is for sure.

Well I could not sleep and wanted to tell everyone about my appointment. But now that I have I am super tired. Hubby and I went on a 3 1/2 mile bike ride tonight and I think it just hit me. LOL

Baby Dust to all :)

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Tuesday is almost here!!!

Tuesday is almost here!! I can not wait to go see Doc H. My appointment is at 1:00 pm on the 26th. I just know he can help me. :)

Today I made double chocolate fudge brownies. They were soooo good. Boober LOVED them and asked "Mommy can you make these everyday?" I told him if I did that I would be as fat as the house. "Giggles" He told me he would still love me no matter how big I got. I was like that is so sweet but Mommy does not want to gain any more unless I am prego. "Giggles"

The things that kids say!!

Baby Dust to ALL!!!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Last Day of School

Boober is giving me such a hard time today. He knows that he has to get his work done and today is the last day of school. So he is trying to test me. He thinks just because it is the last day of school he can take forever to get his work done. I tell you today I want to pull my hair out. LOL The joys of teaching at home. But I know he is getting a better education at home than he would ever get in public school. With his ADHD when he was in regular school he stayed in the office for not being able to sit still when I was not there. So I started always being at the school in his class helping the teacher keep Boober on track. Then it hit me that he was getting behind due to his condition. I pulled him from regular school and started home schooling him. It is so much better on him but, it is harder on me. The things we do for our kids education!

Do not get me wrong. I love Boober and I love teaching him. He just gets the better of me some days and I need to vent. Then I can get my head back into the work, figure out why he is having trouble and change the way it is presented to him for his learning style. This he could never get in regular school. Summer is almost here!!!!!

Baby Dust to all :)

Giving Thanks

Today I am giving thanks for everything good in my life and for all the good in my blogger friends lives as well. :)

Psalm 100 came to mind today:

Shout to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; and give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

God is an awesome God!!
One more week to my appointment with Doc H. I am very excited and I know he can help me. I do not know why but, I feel this appointment will be answered prayers. This doctor is the doctor God wants me to see. I feel like he is meant to help me.

Baby Dust to everyone :)

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Update on Baby Ava

I talked to Baby Ava's Dad today and she is doing good. She is still undergoing light treatment and is still on oxygen. She has a heart murmur so they are monitoring her heart. She has a feeding tube in place and is still in the NICU. The NICU nurses said she got warm and kicked off her little blanket and tried to remove her heart monitor the other day. So she is a little fighter. LOL

She is not out of the woods yet and is still in need of all our prayers. Baby Ava's Mom and Dad are a wreck right now so they have not gotten me pictures of her yet. Which is understandable. As soon as I get pictures of this little beauty I will post them so everyone can see her.

God bless Baby Ava and keep her safe!!

Friday, May 15, 2009

That old Funk

You know how you get into one of those old funks and can not seem to get anything done? Well I was in one for about a week. Now that I am out of it I am looking around and DANG!!!! My house is a WRECK!!! I have been doing laundry all day and picking up toys. They are everywhere. Boober has found new places to stick stuff. I have not told him to clean his room in a week so you can imagine it looks like a BOMB went off in there. LOL So now I am running around trying to make this place look 1/2 way decent today. LOL Lots of work!

I got all the paper work done for my RE appointment and now I am just waiting for the 26th to get here. I am not a big fan of waiting. LOL

I have a new hobby. It is Digi Scrapbooking with photoshop elements. I even made a blog about it. Which is awesome cas I never do anything for me. I tend to forget to stop and just do something for me. Which is important we all know. But easier said than done. Which we all know that as well!!

At least I have not forgotten to take my meds. (Due to the fact I have sticky notes on every place I can think of with a reminder.) I home school my son which I am not sure if I mentioned before and we can not wait for summer to start so we can have a break. Boober is ADHD and getting through his lessons some days is really hard. But we manage to get it all done. Bobber is going to be making a money jar tomorrow and decorating it. It is the pool fund. For every book he reads and tells us what the story is about he gets money to put in his pool fund. Once there is enough money in the jar I will take him for a pool day. Somewhere fun like Breakers Water Park. He is super excited about that. :)

I will have an update on how Baby Ava is doing soon. I am going to be calling her Dad tonight.

Well there went the buzzer on the washer. Time to transfer the clothing to the dryer and start another load going in the wash. A Moms work is never done.

Baby Dust to everyone :)

Thursday, May 14, 2009

A Gift for my Mom :)

Well I made a little gift for my Mom today and I wanted to share it with everyone :) I hope you enjoy it :)

This is a page of Boobers 1st birthday. My mom did not have pictures of his 1st birthday and I thought she did. When I found out she had nothing to remember this day I had to make her something super cute. Look how he tore into that cake. LOL I sent it to her this morning and she loved it.
I am so glad you liked it Mom I love you :)

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The New Look

My new look is coming but in the mean time I wanted to show everyone what great work Jen does. This is one of her free blog layouts from her design site. :)

If you are looking to change your blog up and give it a new jazzy style Jen has some awesome fee blog layouts. She also does custom work. Thank you again Jen for what you are doing for my new look and I can not wait to get it up and running.
Well I just love her layouts and I wanted to show everyone how great it looks applied to a blog. This way I get a new look while we are working on my custom design. :) I do want to add that Jen has super simple instructions on how to apply her layouts to your blog. It was easy to follow and took no time at all :)

Baby Ava needs our prayers!!

Baby Ava needs our prayers!!! A friend of ours Ashlei was discovered to have Preeclampsia and had to be induced on 5-10-09. Little Ava Victoria was born at 2:20 am on 5/11/09. She is 2lb and 8oz. She is such a little beauty. She is in the NICU and the nurses tell us she is doing good. But we know how fast things can change. My heart goes out to her mother Ashlei and her father Justin during this time. God is an AWESOME God!! Please add little Ava to your prayer lists. I am making a prayer button for her that will be available very soon.


The grab it button is now up and running. You can get the code in the bar on the right. Baby Ava does not have a blog so I will be posting her pics on my blog and I will be updating everyone on how she is doing.


I WON!!!!!
I can not believe I won :) I never win anything!! I am super HAPPY and I can not wait for my new look :)
Thank you so much Jen this is going to be AWESOME!!!
Check out Jen's blog here: Following the Footsteps

This is the post were the winners of the contest are listed: Crazy Eights Winners!!!!

Check back to see all the awesome changes to come. This blog makeover is going to be super AWESOME. Thank you again Jen. I can not wait. :) :) :)

Monday, May 11, 2009

Finding something out you did not know!

Have you ever found out something about your self that you did not know and wish you had known? I was filling out all the paperwork for the appointment with Doc. H and called my Mom to get the history questions answered. Let me tell you I found out I have more things in my past history that are big red flags. I just did not know about them. I found out that I had pneumonia from the age of 2 days old off and on until I was 4 years old!!! Can you believe I had no idea of this?? Talk about information I should have known.

I found out that in my family history I have loads of problems as well. :( At least now I know a complete background of everything going on health wise in my family. Let me see here hhhhmmmmm
I did not know that my Mom had a miscarriage before she had my brother. I knew my Dad had cancer. I did not know my grandmother and Mother both have thyroid problems. I did not know my Mom has blood clotting disorders. Which I should have known due to the MTHFR. I knew my mother has diabetes but, I never knew my grandmother has it as well. Both my grandfather on my mom and my dad's side had heart disease. It is amazing what you learn from filling out a 10 page medical history report for the RE. At least now I know all this information and maybe just maybe it will help Doc. H help me to conceive and hold a baby to term. Which I have not been able to do since my son was born. He is almost 9 and I can not believe he is getting so big. I look into his eyes and I can still see my little Boober taking his first steps.

Today I am praying for all my blogger friends and there little ones (grow little babies your Mommies love you so much). It must be the year of miracles. So many are prego right now and I am supper happy for each and everyone of them. :) It gives me hope and shows that God is such an AWESOME God. Miracles do happen I am just waiting for mine. :)

Baby Dust to ALL!!!


Following the Footsteps is putting on a super give away. All you had to do is find the crazy eights in her blog posts and post them in the giveaway to win a blog button or a blog makeover. I have entered a LOT in the blog makeover and I soooooo want to WIN. It is an awesome contest and I would like to take the time to thank Jen for putting this on. This contest is in celebration of her 800th post. That is super awesome Jen!! Congrats on your 800th post :)

You can read all about it in this post: Crazy Eights.
I really want to win one of those blog makeovers :) Thank you again Jen for doing this contest it is AWESOME :) :) :) I hope next time I am quick enough to post a blog entry on any new things she does before it ends. Pop over and check out her blog it is super fun. I promise to be on the ball next time and let you know about cool contests before they end in the future.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Internet was down

Sorry I have not posted in a few days. My Internet and phone has been down for a week. I called the cable company and they finally came to see what the problem was. They got here yesterday and the tech tells me there is errors coming in from the street like crazy. I was like so what does that mean? He tells me well the problem is not in the house it is coming from out side the house. I was like so what now? He tells me he is going to call in the line technicians to run the line and see were the problem is. Well this morning I got a call from the line tech and he asks me when this started. I told him I have been getting digital distortion on the TV and the Internet has been going out for a month. Then I explain the customer service kept resetting the box and said it would fix it. The distortion got bad a week ago and it was 24/7 and the Internet was down completely. The customer service finally set up a tech to come out and he called in the line tech. The line tech told me "Well this is what has happened I found the problem and it has been fixed." I was like "Well what did you find?" He was like "Someone was stealing your signal and that was cosing all the problems." I was like "WTF" He told me that they were tracking down the house that tied into our signal and they would be charging them with theft of services. So that is my sorted tell of how I lost Internet and TV for a week. LOL

Baby Dust to ALL :)

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Awesome News

I got a call from Doc H's office and my appointment has been moved up to May 26th. YES!!! I am so glad I am getting in 2 weeks earlier :)

I took my son fishing and he caught a big catfish. Boober always catches the biggest fish when we go and he LOVES it. LOL I can not believe Boober is almost 9 years old. I wanted Boober to have siblings that were closer to his age. I never wanted to wait this long to have more kids. If I could rewind time I would have started when he was 1 instead of 3 :( We live and we learn. Well that is my ramblings for tonight.

Baby Dust to All :)

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Cycle Day 17

Today marks cycle day 17. I have been super tired the last few days. A friend of mine called me at 3:00 am to tell me he was in the hospital. 6 calls later and it was 7:00 am I was driving across town to get him from there and take him to get his scripts and take him home. Thank God it was only a stone and he passed it fine. But I was so beat from no sleep that I am still catching up on sleep. LOL I am so glad he is better and it was nothing serious.

Today I just slept most of the day. I did manage to get up and do one errand before I was super tired again. Ever have those days where no matter how much you sleep you are still tired? Well that is me today.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

10 Tips for Facing Infertility

1. Keep reminding yourself that you are not alone.
2. Realize that dealing with infertility is an all-consuming process.
3. Stay calm.
4. Remind yourself you are not a failure if a procedure doesn't work.
5. Have a since of humor about this - even if it doesn't seem at all funny right now.
6. Do your research. Then do some more.
7. Listen to your body and your inner self. If you really listen, you'll learn those two are rarely wrong.
8. Don't rule anything out - from antibiotics to acupuncture and from yoga headstands to standing on your head during sex.
9. Find the right doctor.
10. Don't get angry at your partner for not nurturing you - he is hurting and confused, too.

Some of these made me laugh. But I can see the point in each one. I got this from a book I read about infertility and thought I would share.

Friday, May 1, 2009

The moment a woman decides she wants a Baby!!

From the moment a woman decides she wants a baby, trying to conceive takes on a whole new meaning. For most women, becoming a mother is easy. But for others, it's NOT.

Did you know one in six American couples experience infertility? For a woman lost in baby lust, the very world around them stings like a slap in the face. The unfair part? (Yea, as if there could be anything more unfair than not being able to have the family you've always wanted.) Infertility blasts the baby dreams of everyone with this condition, regardless of age, class, or economic standing. From teachers, nurses, and sells clerks to CEO's and celebs like Brook Shields and Joan Lunden. Even couples that already have a child may experience secondary infertility when they try to give their little one a sibling. This is my story. I have secondary infertility. I know the pain and panic of infertility. I also know the blessed joy of pregnancy and motherhood. Somehow my marriage and I have survived this far. Along the way I have learned more about my body and how it functions, how babies are really brought into this world and what to expect when you're trying to expect than I ever imagined. Let me tell you it is allot more complex than high school sex-ed classes lead you to believe!! I have endured the anguish of multiple miscarriages and secondary infertility and let me tell you it SUCKS!!!! Right now I simply feel left out as if Mother Nature is playing a very sick joke on me while God is busy working miracles elsewhere. I know in my heart that God is with me do not get me wrong that is just how I am feeling right now. I did feel alone until I started this blog and found all of the wonderful ladies that are going through the same things I am going through. I am very grateful for the support of each and everyone of you. You are my strength that gives me hope to continue.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Cycle Day 14

Well today is cycle day 14. Today I have had some cramping like a cyst rupturing again. This time in the right side. The last one was in the left side. So it has been one of those yucky days. I have not felt like doing anything today. I need to get out of this funk I am in. This week has just dragged by and Friday is almost here thank God. June 15th I get to see Doc. H and I am feeling like it is never going to get here. I hate to wait. LOL

I want to do so many things but just can not get motivated to do anything. I hate days like this.
On another note:
Yesterday was my friend Gary's Birth Day!!
Happy Birthday Gary :)

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Show and Tell - A Little About Doc. H

Meet Dr. H. :)

Dr. H was raised in Arizona and graduated in 1984 from the University of Arizona with a degree in biology. He attended medical school at the University of Kansas and obtained his Doctor of Medicine (MD) degree in 1988. Following medical school, Dr. H completed his residency in Obstetrics and Gynecology (OB/GYN) at the University of Kansas in 1992.

During his time as a resident physician, Dr. H became interested in infertility medicine and decided to continue his studies with a fellowship in Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility (REI). Over the next three years, Dr. H studied at the John Hopkins School of Medicine in Baltimore, Maryland. In 1994, he became the co-director of Assisted Reproductive Technologies at John Hopkins. He served in this capacity until returning to Arizona to begin a private practice specializing in REI. He opened the R.H.C. in the fall of 1995.

In addition to serving as fertility specialist at his clinic, Dr. H is also a Clinical Assistant Professor of OB/GYN at the University of Arizona College of Medicine and serves as the director of the Division of Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility, overseeing the Embryology and Andrology Laboratories and the Assisted Reproductive Technologies Program. He lectures and teaches frequently on various topics related to reproductive endocrinology, has extensive research experience, and has published articles on infertility treatment.

Dr. H takes his time with patients, as he enjoys patient interaction and assisting couples in achieving resolution of their problems. He is kind and good-hearted, and will readily admit that he worries excessively about his patients.

So what do you think ladies??? Does Doc. H seem like a good choice for me?? :) I am excited to get in to see him and get this ball rolling.

I did get my blood work back and my FSH is 6.3 and my LH is 7.6 I also got the results from my DHEA and it is 603. I am having D (the bad OB) send me the results in the mail. So I have them for my appointment with Doc. H. Of course D tells me the results are not clear for PCOS. But according to my research having higher LH than FSH on cycle day 5 is another indicator of PCOS. I will be going over everything with Doc. H and see what he tells me. :) Sorry I have been such a bad blogger the past few days but I have been so negative that I did not want to bring anyone down.

My Show and Tell this week is introducing Doc. H
Go check out what the rest of the class is sharing for Show and Tell!

Friday, April 24, 2009

So long to crappy D

So long to crappy D is right!!
D (my OBGYN no more) has given me nothing but trouble. I got to thinking and looking back at my posts why did I not ditch her sooner??? All the signs were there in front of me but I did not see them!
Lets take a look back......

1st visit:
D = "Sorry about your miscarriage. I am sure it is nothing to worry about."
Me = "This is my third miscarriage!! I am sure it is something. I have PCOS and Endometriosis as well."
D = "Oh your third? Well there must be a problem."
Me = "What are we going to do to find out what is wrong?"
D = "I am ordering blood work for you and you need to go to the lab for a blood draw."
Me = "OK so we are going to find out what is going on then? Will you treat me for my PCOS as well."
D = "Oh yes the PCOS. I will be getting you a script for that."
Me = "GREAT"
D = "Go have the blood work done first tho."
Me = "I will go to the lab now."

2nd encounter with D:
Me = "Hello"
D = "Hello Jennifer. I got the results of your blood work."
Me = "Good"
D = "your HCG levels dropped so it was your third miscarriage."
Me = "Yes I know. But what do we do now?"
D = "You need to come in for another blood draw in 1 week."
Me: "OK just tell me the day and I will be there."
D = " In one week the Lab will have your paper work. Just go to the lab and have the draw."
Me = "OK will do."

3rd item with D:
Me: "I am hear for the blood work for D."
Lab = "I do not seem to have your paper work."
Me = "D told me it would be here."
Lab = "Jennifer let me go check with D about what you are getting blood work for."
Me = "OK"
Lab = "OK we are checking your HCG again."
Me = "OK"
Lab = "All done! D will call you tomorrow with the results."
Me = "OK"

4th encounter with D:
Clinic = "Hello"
Me = "I am calling for Doc. D she did not call me yesterday with the results of my blood work like I was told."
Clinic = "Please hold."
D's nurse = "Jennifer sorry D did not call you. Your HCG is now at 0 so yes it was a natural miscarriage this time and no D&C is needed."
Me = "I am glad I do not have to have another D&C."
D's nurse = "Come back in 6 weeks for a bunch of tests (blood work) so we can see what is causing this."
Me = "Will the lab have my paper work this time?"
D's nurse = "Oh Yes! They will get it a week before so we know they have it."
Me = "OK I will be there."

5th item with D:
Me = "Hello, I am here for blood work for D."
Lab = "your name please."
Me = "Jennifer"
Lab = "Are you sure you are to get blood work today."
Me = "Yes I am suppose to have a complete panel for recurrent miscarriages."
Lab = "Let me check with D."
Me = "OK"
Lab = "OK I have your paper work now."
Me = "About time."
Lab = "So you have had 2 pregnancies right?"
Me = "NO, I have had 4 pregnancies and one resulted in my son. I have had three miscarriages."
Lab = "OH, OK we are taking 12 vials of blood today."
Me = "12???"
Lab = "Yep"
Me = "OK"
Lab = "All done."
Me = "when will the results be back?"
Lab = "D will call Monday with the results."
Me = "OK"

6th thing with D:
Clinic = "Hello"
Me = "I need to speak to D about my test results."
Clinic = "Please hold"
Me = "OK"
Clinic = "D is not available I will put you in the answering system so you can leave her a message."
Me = "OK"
Me = "I am leaving a message for D. She has not called me with the results of my blood work yet. Please call me back"

7th thing with D:
Left another message

Left another message.

9th thing with D:
D = "Jennifer you need to see an endo you have MTHFR."
Me = "I have what??"
D = "MTHFR I am sending you a copy of your blood work. Go see Endo and he can treat the MTHFR"
Me = "OK when do I go see him?"
D = "In 2 weeks I will get you an appointment."
Me = "OK"

D = "I got you an appointment for this Tuesday."
Me = "WOW that quick?"
D = "Yea I was surprised he could see you that fast."

Endo = "I only see people that are 20 weeks pregnant and over. I do not see any one before 20 weeks."
Me = "OK did you look at my blood work?"
Endo = "YES, I do not even know what this plasminogen act inhibitor-1 is. But it is high so there is an issue there. You need to see an infertility specialist or a RE."
Me = "here is my research from the Internet on it."
(handed the paper work to him)
Endo = " Well..... I see .... Yes ..... You have a hormone deficiency and this needs to be treated. You are on the right track here. Yes .... Yes you are. I will tell D who you need to see so she can get you over with the right doctor."
Me = "I paid a $25 co pay for that?"
Endo = "You paid a co pay?
Me = "YES"
Endo = "Go up front and get a refund."
Me = "Thank you"

D = "I do not like what the Endo told you. I will check with a friend of mine that is a better Endo."
Me = "OK"

The visit from hell!!!!
D does not know how to prescribe MTHFR meds. She does not know how to do hormone therapy. She is just a BAD OB!!

Got to get in to see the best RE in the state "H". I have my appointment and I am on the waiting list to get in sooner. So looking back I should have ditched her long ago. You live and learn and then learn some more. LOL

Hello wonderful "H"

So that is my rambling for this early morning. HEHEHEHE I could not sleep. :)
Sorry it is so long :)

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

On the Phone

I was on the phone for most of today with the insurance company. During my call I spoke to B. I explained everything that happened and B started searching in her provider computer for a doctor that could help me. B was super sweet and sounded like she really understood my troubles. She made me feel better and gave me hope. I think it was just having someone that would listen to me and tell me she was going to find someone to help me. B then told me she saw something. I asked what and she told me the doctor that I had been seeing for years before she opened her own practice (the doc that delivered my son) and now does not take my insurance. Well her husband takes my insurance and I have open network. She explained that means I can go see him without a referral. I was like REALLY!!! He is like the best infertility specialist in the state!!!! B got excited and told me yes that is the one!! I was bouncing in my chair with excitement. There is hope for me!!!! B told me CALL HIM and get in to see him. He is listed as infertility only and normally the insurance does not cover infertility but covers him!! I was like REALLY!! She then told me YES the insurance will pay for him to treat you!!! More excitement!!! I thanked her again and again for her help. and got off the phone to make the call to the infertility specialist!!!

The call:

I explained all my problems and what had happened at the OB's office and his nurse told me that sounds like that OB (we will call her D) (we will call the infertility specialist H) I was seeing. I said really and I thought I was the only one she did that to!! We will call the nurse N. Well then N told me I need to be on the folgard and not to pick up the prometriam H will have me taking something better. N continued to tell me I can get in to see H on June 15th but there is a cancellation list she calls everyday. She asked would I like to be on that list. I told her YES please. So she added me to the list and explained I could get in at anytime before my appointment to see H. All I have to do is answer the phone when they call!!! I was like I will have my phone on all the time and with me so I can get the call. She gave me loads of hope and I got off the phone smiling from ear to ear.

I picked up the prescription for the folgard and started taking it and can not wait to get the call to get into see H sooner. I called my Mom and told her everything and she was excited as well!!


Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Appointment with my OBGYN

I went to the appointment to see my OBGYN today. I am so pissed off and I will not be seeing her again!! OK OK here goes.... I get to my appointment at 1:45 pm and I am told the doctor is running 20 min behind. That did not bother me at all so I signed in and sat down to wait. After 20 minutes had passed she announced the doctor was running 1 hour behind. I had waited all this time for that appointment I was not about to leave so I waited more. After being in the waiting room for 1 and 1/2 hours my name was called. I got up went and had the nurse take my blood pressure. After that I get to a room were I waited about 30 more minutes. This did not upset me I know there is a long wait when I go in there and was expecting it. When the doctor came in that is when I started getting mad.

She comes in and starts by telling me that she does not know enough about MTHFR to treat me. I was like then why did you not tell me this on the phone? Why did I have to come in to hear this!! She tells me that during pregnancy I will need heperin shots for the MTHFR and only need baby aspirin as well. I was like WTF!!! I asked her about the PCOS and she tells me it is mentioned in my chart but the blood work is missing. She tells me I need to have blood work to back up the PCOS diagnosis in my records. So I am like well take the blood work then!! She agreed to have the lab draw the blood. I asked her about the MTHFR and she told me it only effects when you are trying to conceive and I explained it is a blood clotting disorder and started listing off the things it causes if not treated. She looked at me like I had 3 heads. She was clueless!! She told me I was too high risk for her and if I did get pregnant that she would not treat me. She told me I needed to go to a gene specialist and a high risk clinic. I explained about the Plasminogen Act Inhibitor-1 being high is a lack of progesterone. Then asked if she was going to do anything with the hormone therapy and the vitamins I need for the MTHFR. She looked at me and said "What do you want me to do?" I looked at her and said I need folgard or folate for the MTHFR and I will need hormone therapy for the plasminogen act inhibitor-1. She pulled out a prescription pad and told me "I have never written a scrip for folgard I will have to look it up and for the progesterone I will write it for prometriam." I asked how should I take it and would she be checking my levels to make sure I am getting the right amount? She then told me "I do not know (shrugging her shoulders) you need 100 mg twice a day." I asked on what days do I need to do this and what about monitoring my levels? She looked at me and said "Take it when you want. I will not be treating you anyway." I was like no you will not be!!!

She got mad because I knew more about my conditions than she did and that I was not afraid to ask her questions about it and make sure I was getting the right treatment. If you take to much progesterone on the wrong days it will throw you into early menopause. Who wants that?? I sure as hell do not want that to happen!! I am pissed off so bad. I got my blood drawn and told the lab I want the results sent to me by mail and a phone call of the results as well. So this will take 5 days to get them. I will be on the phone tomorrow with the insurance and changing doctors that is for sure!! Another set back for me and I am getting really frustrated by all the run around.

All the $25.00 co pays to see the doctors over the last 3 years adds up!!! I am just really upset and this is my fussing session. for today. Right now I am out of hope!!!

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Cycle Day 3 is here...

Well today is cycle day 3. Tuesday I go to see my doc so I am excited about that. I get to pick up my prescriptions then as well. YAY!!! I am so looking forward to having my issues treated so we can get prego and stay that way with a healthy baby :) Having a 35 day cycle is so very frustrating!! I am so looking forward to not having this problem any longer.

I am going to be taking new pictures of me and my Boober. As soon as I do I will post them with what we were doing in the pics. I told Boober about the show and tell and he wants to play too. So I will try my hardest to get a show and tell post up for everyone by Monday :) With the appointment coming up I have not been able to think of anything else.

Super hugs to everyone!!!
May God Bless and Keep you :)

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Cycle Day 35

Well today is cycle day 35. I am not sure what to think this cycle. I think I Oed and that is a big thing for me. Since I do not O like I should be. If AF has not started by Tuesday I am going to be talking to my OB at my appointment. I do not want to get excited or anything and I do not think I am preg. So I will wait. I hate how messed up my cycles are.

Today I am going to spend the day with a friend and just try to have a good time. Keep my mind off my troubles. LOL

On another note.... I got a spam comment on my blog. I love comments but I hate spam. I was like wow!! I deleted it but it was a comment about "Come buy viagra"!!!! Like WTF!! We do not need this stuff!!! HAHAHA We are trying to get pregnant not having a problem with a limp noodle. It made me laugh and I thought I would share. I hope it made you laugh as well. :) :) :)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

A Little Update!!

Talked to my OBGYN's nurse yesterday. She told me since she was not able to call me back on Friday (like she told me she was going to and never did) the spots for today (Tuesday) are all full. BUMMER!!! So she made the appointment for 1:45 pm on the 21st. I was like OOOOKKKKKK!!! At least I have an appointment now! If I have to lock my doc in that room with me on the 21st I am going to get a plan in motion and get ALL my questions answered. LOL

Today I am going to spend the day with Boober and Hubby. We have some errands to run and then off to the park for Boober to play. :) He loves going to the park!! I will read a book to keep my mind off the appointment that I did not get for today and try not to focus on the appointment next week till it gets closer. Easier said than done I know. Hehehe

Today marks cycle day 34 with a BFN on PT. :( I hate having cycles that are sooooo out of whack. My cycles run from 32 to 38 days in length. Hormones are all messed up as well. I am going to be pushing the issue at the appointment. I even typed up my complete medical history that I will print out and present to my OB when I go in to see her. She does not want to send me to a RE even tho she knows all my issues. This is a down in the dumps day for me!! I need to look into Boober's eyes and give him a big hug so I can find my smile again.

This is my Boober :) He looks so cute when he first wakes up. LOL I am going to be getting the newer pictures off the camera card soon!!! :)

Monday, April 13, 2009

Happy Easter

Happy Easter everyone!!

I am still trying to get with the Doc for that appointment on Tuesday. I hope to get in to see her. I am so tired of waiting for a plan.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Finally got to talk to my Doc...

This picture is one of our Arizona sunsets. As crazy as I feel right now looking at this picture calms me a little bit. My hubby took this picture for me. It is a really pretty one and I wanted to share!!

Well I finally got in touch with my Doc. Since we have been playing catch me if you can she wants me to come into the office to talk with her on Tuesday. So we were making the appointment and she had to go. She told me she was going to call me right back and she did not call back. DAMN DAMN DAMN!!! So now I have to wait until Monday to try to get that appointment for Tuesday. This is my luck!! I am so dang frustrated and just plain mad that nothing is getting done. I NEED A PLAN and I NEED TO KNOW WHAT MY TREATMENT IS GOING TO BE!! Super frustration making its way to the surface.

She did tell me on the phone that she wants me to continue the LD (low dose) aspirin and she wants to put me on Heparin. That is a start but I will not know anything until the appointment. She wants to talk to me more about my PCOS diagnosis during the appointment. I am just praying that she finally treats me for the PCOS as well.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

No Call Yet!!!!


Still no phone call!! Can you believe this. Tell someone you are going to call and then you are waited on you for days. Now the week is over and you never called!! I am so frustrated right now!!

Not knowing what the plan is SUCKS!! Being told you will be called and never hearing from them SUCKS!!

My OB was suppose to call me this week and let me know what we are to do for my treatment. I waited all week for that call and it never came. I am not in a good place today. I sit here and wonder if I will ever be able to carry another baby to term?? Will my doctors finally listen to me?? Will I go crazy before I have an answer?? I am not sure but I do know I am frustrated.

I need to talk to my OB to ask about clomid, progesterone supplements, and folate or folguard. I have so many questions about my treatment that are not getting answered. I am going to be calling her office on Monday so I can try to get some answers for myself.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Still Waiting for that call!!


Well here I sit waiting by the phone to find out what the OB has to tell me. I soooooo hate to wait!! Last weekend Boober and I went to a movie with a friend of mine so I got out of the house for a little while at least. Facing people that want to know when and if you are going to have another baby is starting to get to me. Lucky me my friend that I went to the movies with knows what is going on. So getting out with him is refreshing. :) Hubby was off Monday and Tuesday so I spent those days with him and Boober.

I did have a cyst rupture yesterday and let me tell you OUCH!! I had a terrible pain in my tummy all day. It was the same pain I felt the time when the hospital thought my appendix was rupturing so I knew what it was this time. I have had several that way since that trip to the ER. The trip to the ER was the worst one I had ever had so I was not sure what was wrong that time. Sucks to have such pain and not be able to do anything about it. It has become the norm for me unfortunately tho. At least now when it happens I know what it is. Not sure why, but knowing makes it a little easier.

I will wait and hope I get that call today. I hope to have an update about what my treatment is going to be soon.

Friday, March 27, 2009

A Call from my OBGYN

This is such a funny picture I just had to share with everyone for a good laugh. :)

Well now on to what this post is about. lol I got a call from my OGBYN today and she is checking with another specialist about what my treatment should be. My OB had sent me to a specialist and I went to see him. The specialist told me I was in the wrong place. My OB did not like what the specialist told me and does not agree with him at all. LOL I know bucket of yuck, right?? So, now she is checking with a friend of hers (that is a specialist) about my treatment.

I reminded her of my PCOS again and that it was not being treated. She told me there is not much that can be done for it since I am trying to conceive. I then informed her that something needs to be done due to my hormones being all messed up and me not ovulating like I should be.

I ovulate maybe 1 or 2 times a year and my hormones are all out of wack. With all this mess going on, when I do ovulate and get pregnant my body is not ready
to sustain a pregnancy. I informed her of all of this and she is going to get back with me next week on what the specialist told her my best course of treatment should be. I will let everyone know what she tells me. Thank you to the people that have posted comments on my blog of support. The comments truly mean alot to me. :)

Saturday, March 21, 2009

My Day

Well today was another day of waiting. I called my doctors office and left a message letting them know they sent me to the wrong specialist. I have not gotten a call back from her yet and so more waiting.
My little guy is not so little anymore he has gotten so big. My boober is 8 years old now. I can not believe he is 8. I guess I should not have blinked. lol

What am I taking now??
Here is the list:
One Source Prenatal
LD aspirin 81 mg
B6 100 mg
Folic Acid 1600 mcg
B12 500 mcg

I have noticed I feel better now that I have added more Folic Acid and I do not have as many migraine headaches. I have been complaining about the migraines since I was 17 years old and no doctors could tell me anything that would help. Now they are better just from taking more Folic Acid. Go figure! The doctor has still not told me what they are going to do to treat my PCOS and I am not going to stop bugging them until they treat my issues they know I have. So today I did some running around and just spent the day with my son. I thank God for him every time I look at him.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

My Story

My Son was born on 06/30/2000. That was a great day for us. My son was 6lb and 8 oz, healthy and perfect. My pregnancy was uneventful and went perfect. There was no indication that there was anything wrong with me at all. I had to have a C Section with him due to him being breach. But other than that nothing went wrong. Thank God!! He is 8 years old now and full of energy. He is the light of my life. :)

My husband and I waited before we started trying for our second baby. That is when all my problems started. We tried for a year before we got that positive pregnancy test. We were so very happy and we told everyone I was pregnant and going to have another baby. My son was so excited he kept telling every one his sister was growing in Mommies tummy. He really wants a sister. On 01/02/06 I went to the doctor for my first appointment and my son was so excited. We were there for a sonogram and he was going to get to see the baby. The appointment went fine and we got to see the baby on the sonogram and got pictures and everything. Everything looked fine and the baby had a strong heart beat.

On 01/05/06 I started spotting and I was so worried I got into the car and raced to the hospital. Fear rising from the pit of my tummy. What could be wrong? OMG the baby has to be all right! Please let everything be all right! I was repeating all these things all the way to the hospital. I get to the hospital and get checked in and I inform the nurse of everything that was happening and that I was 11 weeks pregnant. She smiled at me and told me I would be called back soon and sent me back to the waiting area of the hospital. I was freaking out as the time passed in that waiting area. 1 hour, 2 hours, 3 hours later still in the waiting room. I returned to the desk and explained I was pregnant and spotting and I had been waiting for 3 hours. Why was I not being seen immediately. She smiled and told me I would be called next and they were busy with people with the flu. I was screaming in my head "THE FLU!!! THE FLU!!! What about me??? I am PREGNANT and BLEEDING!!!" I was informed since I was still in my first trimester and if I was miscarrying there was nothing they could do but to tell me that was what was happening so please have a seat and wait. I lost it then. I started to cry and could not believe this was happening.

After 4 hours in the waiting room I am called back and put in a room. The doctor comes in and checks my cervix to see if it was closed and it was. He then tells me he is going to order a sonogram and I have to wait more. 2 hours later I was taken to the sono room and the nurse turned the screen away from me to do the sono. She would not let me even look at the monitor. I am freaking out even more and crying. By this time my head feels like it is going to explode. I ask her about the sonogram and she tells me with a smile that the doctor will look at the results and come to my room and discuss it with me. She is not allowed to discuss what she sees in the sonograms. The aid comes in and takes me back to the room they had me in and the waiting continues. After waiting 2 more hours the doctor comes in and tells me "Your baby has died in the womb. You can confirm this with your OBGYN when you see her." Just like that!! Word for word!! I was shocked and completely floored by this. Why tell me this way? Why not tell me with some feeling and kindness!! I had never been treated so bad by a doctor in my life and at the worst possible time. I drove home, crying the whole way.

I got home and curled up in a ball on the bed beside my husband. He asked what was the matter and I told him I lost the baby. He was shocked and got up and called my OBGYN and she wanted to see me as soon as the office opened. I dragged myself into her office were I was happy not even a week earlier and waited to see her. She confirmed the baby did not have a heart beat any longer. Our worst fear had happened. We scheduled a D&C for one week from that day.

On 1-7-06 the bleeding got worse and the pain was like no other I had ever felt in my life. I collapsed on the hall floor from the pain and my husband called 911. I was taken by ambulance to the hospital for an emergency D&C. One of the other OBGYN's from my doctors office was at the hospital and did the D&C.

A month after the D&C I was experiencing pain and went to the hospital. They thought my appendix was rupturing. They got me back within 30 minutes of getting there (not the same hospital I went to before). After checking me out, they said it was not my appendix at all. It was a large cyst in my ovaries that was rupturing. That was what was causing the pain. After this happened I was checked by my OB and told I had PCOS. She wanted to check for endometriosis as well. She told me this was done through laparoscopy. I scheduled the laparoscopy.

On 02/09/2006 I had the laparoscopy done and endometriosis was found. My OB removed all she could but could not get it all. I was told after the surgery that was why I was having so many problems with my periods each month. I was told the first miscarriage was nothing to worry about and to try again. She was sure I would be fine.

On 12/29/2006 after not ovulating for a year I got a positive pregnancy test. I called my OB and she wanted to see me on 01/17/07. I was very nervous and excited all at the same time.

On 01/17/2007 I went in to see my OBGYN and she did a sonogram I was 9 weeks pregnant. But to our heartache there was no heart beat. The baby looked perfect but there was no little heart beat. I closed my eyes and started to cry. It had happened to us again. My husband and my OBGYN cried with me. It was another very sad day for us. We waited a week and did another sonogram on 01/24/07 to see if my notes were wrong on my last cycle date. I knew they were right but I prayed they were wrong. The dates were not wrong, there was still no heart beat. We scheduled the D&C and had it done on 01/29/2007.

01/19/2009 marked my 3rd miscarriage. This one was only 5 weeks and I went through a natural miscarriage with this last pregnancy. Now the testing starts to see why we have been experiencing all these problems. I had a bucket of blood taken for testing and it was found that I have MTHFR. One copy of the C677T mutation and one of the A1298C mutation. But my homocystine levels are normal. It was also found that I have a high plasminogen act inhibitor-1. I was sent to see a specialist that told me I was in the wrong place and I needed a endocranologist instead. So now I am checking with my insurance to get an appointment with one of those.

After everything I have gone through I am still not being treated for my PCOS and now I have two more to add to the list. I will update as I receive more information and share what I am doing about my conditions here. I will be adding more every day as I find things out and as things happen. Pray for me and my family and send baby dust our way.

More to come.